And so does little Maria's cover of Lady GaGa's track. And she didn't even have to pay Ark Music Factory.
You see Lady GaGa and the machine, from Jimmy Iovine all the way down to the lowliest music business student, have lost the plot. Music is not about marketing, it's about conception.
"Satisfaction" came to Keith Richards in a dream. Some of the greatest music of all time was written in fifteen minutes. You see art is about inspiration, AFTER perspiration. And sometimes that perspiration isn't even practicing your instrument, but thinking. What we love is new and different, not what's come before. Lady GaGa rips off a Madonna tune and makes a video extravaganza.
Credit Madonna ( above )herself, even she knew it was not about repetition. That was Madonna's genius, she constantly confronted us with something new and different, something unexpected. The woman could barely sing, but she kept our attention. Because she knew art was not about money, but the impression. As in how does it hit the audience?
Vevo's got a problem. They call it ads. Do you really want me to sit through fifteen seconds of sell every time I want to see this rip-off GaGa track? Do you think I know I'm not paying? Do you think I'm not pissed off?
There is art in pissing people off. If it's intentional.
But if you're all about the profit, we don't believe in you.
Just like we'll line up for days and overpay to get inside the building to see our heart's desire while shows featuring production, manipulation of our wallets rather than our minds, play to empty seats.
"Friday" is so bad it's good.
The concept of a barely developed thirteen year old wanting to be a pop star is an unintentional commentary on a business mining nitwits for nickels. Tell me again about Willow Smith's life experience, that allows the tyke to be a musical star? It's the industry that foisted Willow upon the masses.
And T-Pain not only popularized auto-tune, they've auto-tuned the news to great success. Once again, this takeoff, this innovative use, was not done by the "artists" controlled by the major labels, but outsiders, with tools and insight.
As for inane lyrics, we keep hearing that will.i.am is a genius.
"Friday" is an unintentional parody of modern pop music. And that's why we can't stop watching it. Because it's almost good. Stay through the entire clip and the song gets stuck in your head. It won't change your life, but it's not easy to forget.
And it's so easy to forget the market manipulations.
It's like the business has been selling soap instead of music.
It's not about excising rough edges. It's not about lining up publicity. It's about using tools, which are now cheap and prevalent, to capture lightning in a bottle.
There's more humanity in little Maria's take of "Born This Way" than Lady GaGa's. You can see right through the image inside the performer. Watching GaGa's clip you've got to penetrate the director's scrim to a woman who doesn't want to reveal her true self for fear we might not like what we see. If only GaGa threw away the costumes and just sang the song sitting at a keyboard like Maria. That would be innovative. One take, with mistakes, then we'd be interested. Instead GaGa's video is like a failed network TV show.
You don't want to believe all this. Because that means there's no map, no rules, you've got to forge your own path.
But if you get it right, you can succeed beyond your wildest dreams.
Believe me, Rebecca Black never thought she'd become a household name
And just possibly, she'll get a few more minutes of fame.
Did you see her on "Good Morning America"?
The program is frightening. Asking Black about cyberbullying when they're bullying her themselves. All smiles, dashing for dollars, using this child to burnish their ratings. It's television at its worst. But if you stay to the very end, you'll be stunned. Rebecca Black can actually sing. Better than the aforementioned Madonna.
But singing is not enough. To truly last you've got to write. You've got to reach our hearts, change our world by letting us into yours. It's a skill which Rebecca Black hasn't got.
But neither have the rest of the nitwits on Top Forty radio.
Little Maria was built by Perez Hilton.
The people lightning the fire are no longer the mainstream.
Hell, the mainstream didn't even find Rebecca Black, the Tosh.O blog did.
We live in a new world. Word can spread overnight.
If something deserves attention
And Rebecca Black's "Friday" does.
Because it shows how hollow the mainstream music business has become.
I mean where do we go from here? How lowest common denominator can we get? Call-out research featuring a nanosecond of music? Hit songs by babies singing gobbledygook?
If you do something new and different, everybody can know almost instantly.Ponder that.
Dr. Luke can get you on the radio, but no one wants to see you live.
But if you blow up the paradigm, people clamor to get close to you. Like Charlie Sheen. You want a piece of what he's got. How did he get so insane and yet still win?
Credit Live Nation for seeing something none of the rest of us did.
In other words, concert promoters are now more innovative than record companies. Because record companies no longer know how to sell tickets. Hell, they're not even that good at creating train-wrecks.
Rebecca Black is the future. A bolt from the sky that captures our attention.
But someday soon the track won't be tripe, but something closer to "I Want To Hold Your Hand".
Get ready.
YouTube views:
"Friday" Rebecca Black (http://bit.ly/gn4mWP): 29,807,978
"Born This Way" Lady GaGa (http://bit.ly/gtx5vu): 22,651,885
"Born This Way" Maria (http://bit.ly/hC0DSM): 24,393,140
Rebecca Black on "Good Morning America": http://bit.ly/ew1zpf
P.S. And while I've got your attention, be sure to listen to this "Bob Dylan" parody of "Friday". This is art, this keeps our attention, not GaGa repeating herself: http://bit.ly/dGKn5L
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